Woman Struggles With F#ck Me Eyes


by The Lost Comics

Valentines Day Dirty Dozen Midnight Show @ Helium (After Jen Kirkman)

helium valentines

Saturday night after you've wined and dined the shit out of a pretty lady, take her to the raunchy midnight show at Helium to see if she's really a keeper. If she laughs at Mike Rainey and company's vulgar jokes about filching, smegma, and whatever else these god-damned rembrandts are discussing, you know it's true love and not just an expensive 4am uber fare.

Scoop up tickets while they last, and while you're at it, check out Jen Kirkman of Drunk History fame who'll be performing Thursday through Saturday.

Win Kyle Kinane Tickets @ Underground Arts w/ Hashtag War: #NextNFLscandal

Kyle Kinane

Kyle Kinane performs at Underground Arts on Monday February 23rd. Tweet at us to win a pair of tix (@WitOutDotNet) with your hashtag joke: What will be the next NFL scandal? Something like "Roger Goodell sex-tape" or "Michael Sam is actually straight".

Funniest scandal, as judged by the WitOut.net intern corps, gets a free pair of tickets. We'll leave the contest open for about a week. And... GO!