Here’s what everyone wore last night at Aaron Hertzog’s Hey Everybody at Philly Improv Theater at the Shubin Theater 5/21/12. Spoiler alert – Hey Everybody! Summer is here to stay, so break out those Baby Blue Jeans!
AaronHertzog – Grey Henley, untucked, with a rounded neck, sleeves rolled up to the elbows and a pocket on the left breast, white shoes with white laces and blue jeans.
Sam Narisi – Blue hoodie with a white un-zipped zipper, white draw strings, a plaid shirt, untucked, with a beige base with teal/purple vertical stripes and thin red/pink horizontal stripes buttoned to the top with 2 collar buttons buttoned, black shoes with white laces and white soles and grey pants.
Juliet Hope Wayne – Dark brown shirt with a white lamb with pink ears, black eyes, and black nose and mouth, over a light blue t-shirt poking out at the waist, black shoes with white laces, white sole and white wavy lines on the sides, and blue jeans.
Darryl Charles – Dark navy blue polo shirt with thin white stripes, a golden crest over the left breast, over a white t-shirt visible over the collar, white shoes with white laces and grey soles, and blue jeans.
Chip Chantry – Grey t-shirt with the letters “pants.” in black, over a white undershirt visible over the collar, dark navy blue shoes with a white letter “N”, black digital wrist watch on the left hand and blue jeans.
This week, I take a break from sitting down and chatting with comedians and let Corin Wells do all the work. Corin, along with Darryl Charles, Chris Cotton, Blythe Wimbush and Setoiyo gathered to talk about the state of Black comedy in Philadelphia. They discuss their own experiences as well as their thoughts on the city, past, present, and future. You can listen here, or subscribe on iTunes.
The 2011 WitOut Awards for Philadelphia Comedy were last night at World Cafe Live. The Philadelphia comedy community gathered together to hand out the awards which they themselves nominated and voted for. In case you missed it, here’s a full rundown of the winners in each category.
Best Host: Chip Chantry – host of Chip Chantry’s One Man Show (with Special Guests) and Facetime with Chip Chantry
Special thanks to World Cafe Live for allowing us to have our “clown friend clubhouse goofball jerkoff party” in their establishment. Also thanks to everyone who helped produce the show. The writers: Aaron Hertzog, Chip Chantry, Doogie Horner, Rob Baniewicz, Mary Radzinski, Jim Grammond, Becca Trabin, Joe Moore, Luke Giordano, Billy Bob Thompson, Greg Maughan. The video spots were put together by Rob Baniewicz and Shannon Devido. Also thanks to all the presenters and of course, the host of the evening Joe Moore.
Think just because it’s 2012 we’re going to stop running Top 5 of 2011 lists? Nope. As long as you keep sending them, we’ll keep posting them. Well, maybe not, “as long as” maybe for just a week or two. Go ahead, try us.
We’re not talking about the Appalachian Trail or even Kilimanjaro… (Sue starts singing “Africa” by Toto, Darryl says “That’s racist!” And runs off crying) We’re talking vodka. America’s Sweethearts, Darryl Charles and Sue Taney, agreed to take on the arduous task of tasting *almost all of Pinnacle’s 34 flavors to bring you the “TOP 5 PINNACLES LIST.”
5. Cake – We’re gonna eschew some kinda “Have your cake and eat it too” or a “Let them eat cake” or “Like a fat kid loves cake” (who are you calling fat?! Sue runs off crying…) reference and just say birthdays will no longer be spent in Applebee’s like the slobs of suburbia anymore. We wanna spend it alone, in a dirty wife-beater, watching reruns of intervention drinking this stuff. It’s that good, even if it is the most alcohol-like tasting thing on this list. Also, Darryl wants to say this is probably the only food stuff available on set at a Max Hardcore shoot. Well, that and shame.
4. Marshmallow – Less alcohol taste than #5 and it tastes like friggin marshmallows! And not in a nasty, super sweet way either. You can almost taste the powdered sugar that should surround each shot of this stuff. You’ll feel like the stay-puff marshmallow man just jizzed in your mouth, in a good way.
3. Whipped – The OG of the flavored vodkas could have been number one based solely on nostalgia. We could write loving essays about all the memories this wonderful creation has made hazy and forgotten. It comes in 3rd though, but if there’s any place to start the flavored vodka journey, it’s here.
2. Le Double Espresso – Move over Bloody Marys, there’s a new breakfast drink in town! Like coffee? Good, now imagine all that taste (and some of the caffeine) but as a vodka! Looking to get smashed at work? Just add a shot to your coffee (or add a shot of coffee to your vodka) and mum’s the word. This flavor leaves your breath smelling like coffee, not booze.
1. Butterscotch – “This is gonna be a problem” are the words of any serious drinker who tastes this stuff. Others will say “wow, this tastes like butterscotch,” or “This is amazing,” or “I need an adult!” That good. We’ve compared it to the taste of butterscotch smart water, if such a thing existed. See the problem? Neither do we.
BONUS LIST! TOP 5 CHASERS for the TOP 5 PINNACLES LIST aka WHAT TO GET THE PERSON WHO HAS EVERYTHING: Are you still chasing shots with a drink? Pfft. That’s so 2010. We’ve moved onto the diabetes type 2 approved, solid chaser list. All of these chasers compliment any of the vodkas perfectly but some are just slightly more yum than others.
5. Meats! – Preferably ham or bacon but steak would do just fine if you’re in a pinch. Just a smack of meat is all you need to achieve the delish salty/sweet combo, no need to eat the entire animal.
4. Chocolate chip cookies – Many of our favorite vodkas are almost sugary sweet so it’s nice to chase it with something that’s more of a mellow sweet. Bake ‘em from scratch or get left-overs from your holiday party, pop ‘em in the microwave, and you’ll be well on your way to morbid obesity.
3. Chocolate covered pretzel – It’s pretzels and beer for the new Willenium. Bonus points if the pretzel has jimmies or nuts on it or if you dipped the pretzel in chocolate yourself… because we’re keeping score, right?
2. Chocolate and peanut butter granola bar – An entire bar is a little much but cut one of these babies into sixths, stick a toothpick in each one and the whole affair turns super classy. Pinkies up!
1. Reese’s cup/pieces/fast break/big cup/whipped/minis/sticks – Anything the Reese’s company poops out makes the best chaser for these tasty vodkas because what goes better with sweet vodka than more sweets?! Now all you have to do is pick out what color Hoveround you want when you become too obese to walk.
*after tasting many of the Pinnacle fruit flavors, we decided that they were pretty similar to other fruit vodkas on the market and just weren’t tasty enough to make the list. Mix any of them with cranberry juice and have a good f’n time.
Unfortunately, video of this bit does not exist but his exasperation at the fact that a man could murder an entire building full of people with a hatchet, complete with out-of-breath act outs was the only bit Darryl did during his run to a second place finish at this year’s Philly’s Phunniest Person Contest. Check him out live to see the hilarious bit in action.
It’s been almost an entire month since Helium Comedy Club crowned Tommy Pope 2011’s Philly’s Phunniest Person – and it’s already time for a reunion of some of the comedians that made the final round of this year’s contest. Tonight, the club will host the Philly’s Phunniest Reunion Show featuring sets from Pope, along with runner up Darryl Charles and third place finisher John McKeever, as well as comedy from fellow finalists Chip Chantry and Andy Nolan. The show starts tonight at 8 and you can buy tickets online or (and I would recommend this option) call the club at 215-496-9001, mention any of the performers names, and get free admission. Check out some videos from tonight’s performers below.
A packed crowd at Helium witnessed the cream-of-the-cream of Philadelphia comedy last night during the finals of the Philly’s Phunniest Competition. Beginning almost 2 and a half months ago with 165 comedians, the field had been whittled down to 10 Finalists, who took the stage in order to see who would walk away with the title. The was a true spectacle – each comedian was worthy of raucous laughter, wild applause, and probably a $1,000 prize, but there can only be one winner. Surely those who missed out on this will be kicking themselves for a long time… for those unfortunate souls, here’s a taste of what you missed:
Below are the first and last words spoken on stage by each of 2011’s Philly’s Funniest Finalists:
(Comedian – First Word // Last Word)
Host Dave Smith – Thanks // Night
Pat Barker – Thank // Thanks
John McKeever – Hey // You
Chip Chantry – So // Everybody
Gary Vider – Thanks // Evening
Andy Nolan – Alright // Much
Mike Rainey – Alright // Rainey
Tommy Pope – Hey // Thanks
Gordon Baker-Bone – Yeah // Night
Pat House – Thank // Night
Darryl Charles – Yay // Everybody
Headliner Big Jay Oakerson – Thank // Around
Congratulations to all ten finalists, but a little extra congratulations to Tommy Pope who deservedly was named winner of 2011’s Philly’s Funniest. And to everyone who missed the show – you’re welcome!
ROUND 3 – What has started as a fireside discussion has quickly spread to be a wild fire embroiling the NFL, the NBA, and the friendship of two comedians. Below, the closing arguments from both James and Darryl on who is the biggest asshole: Football players of Basketball players.
James: Darryl, you ignorant slut.
I am surprised that you actually spent the time to write your rebuttal in complete sentences. I expected you to just take one key word or phrase and repeat it over and over again.
“Roethlisberger raped a girl in a bathroom. In a bathroom. A BATHROOM. A BATHROOM!!!!!”
You want to talk about hack? Why don’t you give the audience another twelve minutes of your new material on how women like talking and dudes like sex?
And can you wrap up the joke already? If the audience wanted to see a nine minute bit that ended without a punchline they would have just gone to one of your improv shows. This is stand up. Have some respect.
I’m going to be honest with you, Darryl. There are days where I wonder why I ever thought you were funny. Doing Cheap Laughs at the Raven Lounge, doing CheaPodcast and the Famous International Variety Show, were all just a giant waste of my time. And remember, I’m unemployed right now so my time is very difficult to waste. It’s practically worthless.
Darryl, I don’t know how to say this, but I think that we should stop working together. And I don’t mean that I should stop doing any of the things I’m doing, I mean that you should go ahead and quit comedy all together and go back to your day job. Then you it won’t matter that you’re just like the vodka you drink.
Darryl: There really isn’t much to be summarized. Football players are larger and assholier than basketball players. I tried my best to state my side of the argument while making it fun, which is hard to do when you have dead weight like James Hesky pulling you down constantly.
We’re talking about a guy who ran a blog, two open mic locations and a Saturday night showcase into the ground, all with the same tired jokes about him being fat. It damn near took a congressional hearing to get him to leave poop jokes alone, and all he did was put it later in his set. People are making that face because you suck, not for your eloquent description of a wet shit in a space station.
Poop, being fat, masturbation and religion. The tried and true repertoire of a guy who will never make it out of Philadelphia. Maybe I’m being too harsh. You’ll leave Philly, but only to go back to Pittsburgh after you stop lazing it up on my tax money and crawl back to your mamas basement. There you’ll relive the joke you had that came the closest to making me laugh. That is until your mother cuts off your internet access, then you’ll be sad without having to wack it first.
Having you as my sidekick was my version of watching over an autistic kid; except I did your former job better than you ever did and I’m gonna quit this crap before I get fired. Grow up, get funny and leave me alone. If you can just do one of those I’d be proud of you, and there’s a first time for everything.