Really hoping Will Smith says “Welcome to Battlefield Earth!” to an alien in After Earth.
— Jim Grammond (@jgrammond) May 31, 2013
Just stopped myself from saying something mean on the internet by going outside, taking a deep breath, and punching my neighbor in the face.
— Tim Butterly (@timbutterly) May 31, 2013
I had ice cream for dinner. Hey! At least it was on a sandwich. Am I right I say to no one in the room.
— Carolyn Busa (@misstoiletslave) May 29, 2013
Having difficulty slipping the phrase “were we ever so young?” into casual conversation with this cab driver.
— Doogie Horner (@DoogieHorner) May 31, 2013
I’ll be honest- I’ve been in a fist fight with most of you in my mind.
— Chip Chantry (@ChipChantry) May 27, 2013
I’m at the age where I can understand having a favorite mug.
— Mary Radzinski (@MaryRadzinski) May 29, 2013
Even a baby monkey riding a puppy isn’t cuter than a 5 yr old with corrective eye glasses.
— Tommy Pope (@TommyJPope) May 26, 2013
I wish Abbott and Costello were still around today so they could make “Abbott & Costello Meet the Human Centipede” #fb
— John Kensil (@johnkensil) May 31, 2013
Selling my CDs after this show. Mostly old Beatles and Stones that I’m sick of listening to.
— Amir Gollan (@Agollan) May 31, 2013
I’m buy-curious. I buy Curious George books and then…ya know…
— Jim Ginty (@Jim_Ginty) May 29, 2013