Upcoming Shows

  • October 22, 2014 8:00 pmComedy Masters
  • October 23, 2014 8:30 pmFigment Theater: Sessions @ Studio C
  • October 23, 2014 9:00 pmThe Comedy Attic
  • October 24, 2014 8:00 amNationally Touring Headline Comedians @ Helium
  • October 24, 2014 7:00 pmThe Comedy Works
  • October 24, 2014 8:00 pmThe N Crowd
  • October 24, 2014 8:00 pmCrazy Cow Comedy
  • October 24, 2014 8:30 pmFigment Theater: Sessions @ Studio C
  • October 24, 2014 9:30 pmFigment Theater: Sessions @ Studio C
  • October 25, 2014Nationally Touring Headline Comedians @ Heliun
  • October 25, 2014Nationally Touring Headline Comedians @ Helium
  • October 25, 2014 7:30 pmComedy Sportz Philadelphia
  • October 25, 2014 8:00 pmCrazy Cow Comedy
  • October 25, 2014 9:00 pmComedy Train Rek presents Awkward Sex and the City
  • October 25, 2014 9:30 pmThe Comedy Works
  • October 25, 2014 10:00 pmComedy Sportz Philadelphia
  • October 25, 2014 10:30 pmImprov Comedy: PHIT House Teams
  • October 29, 2014 8:00 pmComedy Masters
  • October 30, 2014 8:30 pmFigment Theater: Sessions @ Studio C
  • October 30, 2014 9:00 pmThe Comedy Attic
  • October 31, 2014 8:00 amNationally Touring Headline Comedians @ Helium
  • October 31, 2014 7:00 pmThe Comedy Works
  • October 31, 2014 8:00 pmThe N Crowd
  • October 31, 2014 8:00 pmCrazy Cow Comedy
  • October 31, 2014 8:30 pmFigment Theater: Sessions @ Studio C
AEC v1.0.4

Top 5 of 2012: Steve Kleinedler’s Top Five People Whose Ability to Grow Hair I Covet

As the year winds down, WitOut collects lists from comedy performers and fans of their favorite moments, comedians, groups, shows, etc. from the last year in Philly comedy. Top 5 of 2012 lists will run throughout December–if you’d like to write one, pitch us your list at contact@witout.net!

I started losing my hair in high school. All of the fun things I got to do in the 1980s with hair dye are long gone. On top of that, I never had to shave regularly until I was in my late 30s. In the late 1980s all I wanted was cool sideburns, and I had to wait until the trend came back around a couple years ago to almost be able to take advantage of it. I didn’t even have armpit hair until I was in my 20s. I spent most of my teen years too mortified to wear a tank top. I view most men with hair and the ability to grow facial hair wistfully. They have something I’ll never have.

Whenever I see these five guys, I can’t help but think about their hair. And how much I want to possess it.

5. Vegas Lancaster (improv team The N Crowd)
His hair has super powers that I cannot begin to comprehend. If you encounter Vegas in a dark alley, you are simultaneously frightened and awed.

4. Jp Boudwin (sketch group Camp Woods)
He can go from full-on French Canadian couch-surfing drifter to slightly more respectable French Canadian couch-surfing drifter simply by getting a hair cut. Also, when he gets his hair cut, he loses ten pounds in one whack.

3. Jess Carpenter (improv team Iron Lung, Comedian Deconstruction)
If I had the ability to rock full-on Wolverine facial hair like Jess does, I would be an unstoppable sex machine. I would do so much with that superpower, but it remains unattainable.

2. Dennis Trafny  (Philly Improv Theater House Team Hey Rube)
Dennis gets the nod over his [improv team] Bierdo brethren because with his bald head and piercing eyes, his head shots make for the best meme generation.

1. Chris Calletta  (Philly Improv Theater House Team Hot Dish)
Chris has the perfect hair of every actor in every hair product commercial and/or Francis Ford Coppola film from the early 1970s. Chris, you probably think I’m constantly cruising you, but really, when I’m staring vacantly at you, I’m for real just coveting your hair.

Steve Kleinedler started doing improv in 1982 and studied and performed off and on in the 1980s and 1990s. He began performing at ImprovBoston in 2001 and teaching and directing there in 2004. He performed with IB’s Harold Team Marjean for three years. Steve directed numerous improv troupes and shows at IB, including The Family Show (2004-2007), Backstory (a ‘Memento’-inspired improv show, which he reprised with Hot Dish for the Philly Fringe festival in 2012), and IB’s sketch ensemble The Ruckus (2007-2010). He’s directed numerous one-person shows and scripted plays. At PHIT he currently directs PHIT house team Hot Dish and has appeared onstage in numerous guises, including Half-Life with Nathan Edmondson.  He is also a founding member of Shattered Globe Theatre in Chicago.

Philly Comedy Round-up, Vol. 70

This video from Jason Messina (formerly of The Sixth Borough, current New York comedian) is a holiday reminder your aunts and grandmothers would be sure to thank him for.

Just because tomorrow is Christmas does not mean that Open Mic at the Headhouse Cafe will be taking the day off. A Very Funny XMAS at the Headhouse will start at 8pm and continue throughout the night for those comics finished with their celebrating, or the ones that aren’t celebrating at all.

This Friday The Sideshow presents: Know When to Leave, a show hosted by Brendan Kennedy and Shannon Brown featuring performances by ManiPedi, Fastball Pitcher Bob Gutierrez, Bing Supernova, Tim Butterly, Carolyn Busa, Sam Narisi, Kait & Andrew, and more.

Saturday the New Year’s Party at HodgePodge (1212 South St.) will feature “music greats: John Francis, James Klueh, GRIZ and a hodgepodge of standup, improv and sketch comics.”

Delaware Today magazine ran a series of short features on native comedians Ian Fidance, Mikey Gleason, Todd Chappelle, and Shari Short. The article also covers emerging venues for comedy in Delaware and shares some jokes from each of the comedians.

Improv duos can mark your calendar as Duofest has announced registration dates for their 2013 festival. Submissions open February 2, with submission deadlines of February 22 for early submissions and March 2 as the final deadline. Applicants will be notified on March 22 and the lineup announced on April 2. The 2013 Duofest will take place from June 6-9.

If you have any Philly comedy news worth mentioning – send it our way with an email to contact@witout.net

“Steak Knives, Jenga, & Holiday Party Etiquette” by Brandon Ryan

If you are a Philadelphia comedy performer that produces a podcast, web series, sketch video, humor column, or any other online content let us know by emailing us at contact@witout.net so we can share it!

Here’s a humor piece from local writer and WitOut reporter Brandon Ryan.

Have you ever attended a house party and been subsequently unable to locate its host?

Here’s a simple fix:

First, locate the kitchen.
Find the refrigerator (some people call this the “ice box” [because they are old, and lived in a time where it was common practice for the average American to maintain a box-shaped igloo in the kitchen]).
Begin to take food out of said refrigerator and stack it, Jenga-like, on the floor.
Be sure to place delicate items at the base of the stack.

As people tend to get very defensive about the way in which their food is stacked, the host should arrive presently.

Still no host?
Move to the kitchen’s electrical appliances.
Ever wonder what it would smell like to cook mayonnaise in a toaster?
Or better yet, to cook mayonnaise in a toaster while the toaster bakes in the oven?
Now is the time to find out.

As people tend to get very defensive about attempting to use their appliances to cook still other appliances, the host should certainly arrive presently.

STILL NO HOST?
Locate the blender.
Dig eggs and raw chicken from the Jenga-like stack of food you’ve assembled on the floor.
Add the eggs and chicken to the blender.
Now add steak knives.
Do not attach the blender’s lid.
Don protective eye wear (safety first!) and depress the MAX BLEND button.
Run.

As people tend to get very angry when you blend their steak knives (especially when they become aware that you have also attempted to cook their appliances using still other appliances), the host should without a doubt arrive presently.

STILL NO HOST?!
Then there likely never was one.