Upcoming Shows

  • April 20, 2014 4:00 pmPHIT PRESENTS: MILLENNIUM QUEST: WARP JAWN
  • April 20, 2014 7:00 pmCAKE BEAR + THE DEAN’S LIST! @ PHIT
  • April 20, 2014 8:30 pmTHE SHAM! @ PHIT
  • April 23, 2014 7:30 pmADVENTURE FRIENDS PRESENT A SKETCH HAROLD + SABOTAGE @ PHIT
  • April 23, 2014 9:00 pmOUTSIDE VOICES + THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN @ PHIT
  • April 23, 2014 10:00 pmOUTSIDE VOICES @ PHIT
  • April 24, 2014 7:30 pmPHIT PRESENTS: MILLENNIUM QUEST: WARP JAWN
  • April 24, 2014 9:00 pmCHEAT CODE W. SPECIAL GUESTS @ PHIT
  • April 24, 2014 9:00 pmThe Comedy Attic
  • April 24, 2014 10:30 pmHOUSE OF BLACK @ PHIT
  • April 25, 2014 7:00 pmThe Comedy Works
  • April 25, 2014 7:30 pmPHIT PRESENTS: MILLENNIUM QUEST: WARP JAWN
  • April 25, 2014 8:00 pmThe N Crowd
  • April 25, 2014 8:00 pmCrazy Cow Comedy
  • April 25, 2014 9:00 pmCHEAT CODE W. SPECIAL GUESTS @ PHIT
  • April 25, 2014 10:30 pmSTORY UP! AFTER DARK @ PHIT
  • April 25, 2014 11:00 pmIRON SKETCH @ PHIT
  • April 26, 2014 7:30 pmSarcasm Comedy Club
  • April 26, 2014 7:30 pmPHIT PRESENTS: MILLENNIUM QUEST: WARP JAWN
  • April 26, 2014 7:30 pmComedy Sportz Philadelphia
  • April 26, 2014 8:00 pmBye Bye Liver: The Philadelphia Drinking Play
  • April 26, 2014 8:00 pmCrazy Cow Comedy
  • April 26, 2014 9:00 pmMEN WITH FACES + BIG BABY @ PHIT
  • April 26, 2014 9:30 pmSarcasm Comedy Club
  • April 26, 2014 9:30 pmThe Comedy Works
AEC v1.0.4

The Pornologues

Description: The Pornologues is a show dedicated to a hilarious discussion of pornography by some of the funniest comedians in Philadelphia.

The Performers:

Jess Carpenter
Darryl Charles
Joey Dougherty
John Kensil
Alex Pearlman
Timaree Schmit
Dave Terruso
Juliet Hope Wayne

and your fluffer: Roger Weaver

Hosted by Ryan Carey

This show is a fundraiser for Philly Sketchfest 2012; all proceeds benefit the festival.

Style: Stand-up, Storytelling

Date: Wednesday, October 10

Time: 8:30-10:00

Admission: $15

Location: L’Etage, 624 S. 6th St., Philadelphia, Pennsylvania 19147

Contact: Website, Facebook Event

Site News: Comedy Calendar

As you already know, one of our goals here at WitOut is to keep a full calendar of all the comedy shows going on in and around Philadelphia. As you also may know, there are a lot of comedy shows going on in this city, and keeping that calendar can be quite a task.

Here’s where you can help! If you are promoting an upcoming comedy show and want it to appear on our calendar, all you have to do is email your information to contact@witout.net in this easy, copy-and-paste format:

Name: The name of your show.

Description: A short description of your show, include performers, a tagline, any information you think is important, and not covered in any of the below categories.

Style: Stand-up, Sketch, Improv, Storytelling, Variety

Date: When is your show?

Time: Include a start and end time if you have one.

Admission: How much is a ticket?

Location: The venue name, and address of the location of your show.

Contact: Any links to websites, facebook events, or ticket purchasing web sites, please.

 

And then you can tell all your friends, “Oh, yeah, my show’s listed on the venerable and highly respected website WitOut.net, so you can find all the details there. It’s no big deal. They’re only Philadelphia’s most exciting and informative comedy blog that tracks all the best shows happening in the city.” You’ll be the coolest!

Flagged Words (NSFW)

By: Anonymous

Some websites or online forums have filters in place that block people from cursing, using hateful slurs, or discussing inappropriate things.

Here I present an actual alphabetical list of the most interesting flagged or disallowed terminology, excluding the usual suspects you’d expect.

Do you think these were researched or came from case studies?
I didn’t write these up to be funny. This is an actual list from an actual website system.

  • Analbeads
  • Baby batter
  • Baby gravy
  • Bearded clam
  • Beaver cleaver
  • Beef curtain
  • Boloney drapes
  • Bukkake
  • Bunghole
  • Butt pirate
  • Carpetmunch
  • Choad
  • Chode
  • Chocolate starfish
  • Cooch
  • Cornholer
  • Darkie
  • Dirty Sanchez
  • Dominatrix
  • Dong
  • Donkey punch
  • Eat her out
  • Eat me out
  • Felch
  • Fellatio
  • Fun bags
  • Golden showers
  • Gorilla salad
  • Honky
  • Jump your bones
  • Knob gobbler
  • Lap dance
  • Lesbo
  • Mangina
  • Mushroom bruise
  • Nipple clamps
  • Pickaninny
  • Pink missile
  • Pink velvet sausage wallet
  • Pocket rocket
  • Porch monkey
  • Purple warrior
  • Queef
  • Raghead
  • Reach-around
  • Slant-eye
  • Sweater kittens
  • Swing both ways
  • The shocker
  • Tijuana donkey
  • Wetback
  • WOP
  • Yard ape
  • Yellow devil
  • Yiffing